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Published on May 21st, 2018 | by voxx


Fraudulent Claim

If you haven’t figured it out by now, I have a mischievous toddler. His name is Van Gogh.

Well, actually he’s called Diego Lucas, but he thinks he’s one of our world class artists. He’s even managed to trick his pre-school teachers. Don’t get me wrong, he has a huge passion for drawing and painting and generally covering his school uniform in paint, along with his arms, his legs and his hair – but that said, it is not to the extent that he likes to make out; as I found out one Wednesday afternoon this month.

On collecting my over-excited, ‘I’ve-really-managed-to-pull-this-one-off hyperactive young man, he shoved a pile of at least twenty drawings in my already over-loaded arms.

Yes, I said twenty.

I questioned him and his teachers. He fluttered his long eyelashes and adamantly insisted each beautifully scribbled, dribbley sheet was his own work. A hunch was bothering me but as I didn’t want to ruin his moment we made our way to the car. An air of guilt lingered like fog over his head. Finally Mr Gogh finally blurted out:

“Not all of them drawings are mine, but nobody put their names on them and I wanted them!”

I stifled my laughter. My kid is a fraudster. When I was his age I attempted to take a unicorn home from school before telling the teachers that I thought I knew where somebody had hidden it; I proudly led them to my own bag. Diego really is a mini me.

I know that I’m going to have to have some ‘words’ with him, but I’m also wondering when to audition him to be an apprentice because he clearly has some fantastically cunning tricks up his snot coated sleeves. With my boy there is never a dull moment.

- By Boneata Bell

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